Posts by Joe Vampire
Joe Vampire

Joe Vampire is the evil HR guy at the company.  He once trained people in the art of phlebotomy but that’s not how he got his pseudonym.  He's not quite sure how it was bestowed upon him, as a matter of fact.  Because he’s in HR, and therefore has no friends, he retreats into a world of horror movies, video games, beards, beers, bears, black metal, and playing guitar for Old Towne Ghosts.

 Oh no.  No!  Nonononono.

I’m really the one that has to do this?  Really?

Fine.

Hi everyone, it’s Joe from HR again.  If I had any sort of professional credibility to begin with, it would be gone by the end of this post.  Why?  Because I helped to facilitate this: a collection of the filthiest pickup lines that Captain Kirk could (and would!) use to bed yet another hot, green alien.

 

Star Trek Green Alien

Only included for reference, obviously. [Source]


We...

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The Guild at C2E2

Things have changed quite a bit since the last time I wrote for the blog.  For one thing, I no longer make my living by hiding under a bridge and collecting tolls from frightened peasants as they attempt to pass (see this previous blog post for reference). Granted, a lot of that has to do with the fact that the city demolished my bridge...

Luckily, halloweencostumes.com recognized my ability to strike fear into the heart of my fellow man and I’m now the HR guy. ...

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So it looks like you have finally decided to embrace your inner geek and make your way down to the nearest comic book/horror/sci-fi/”Star Trek”/action figure/gaming/”My Little Pony”/baseball card/anime/nostalgia/steampunk/any combination thereof convention. Good for you!

Since this is your first time attending something like this, you should know that there are a few rules by which you should abide so as to not be overwhelmed, overheated, over-exhausted and overspent by...

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I had no choice; I was destined for a life of nerdly pursuits. My father is to blame. Sure, my genetics (only half his fault) may have prevented me from having any sort of proclivity when it came to doing anything that involved running or the usage of mostly spherical object colloquially known as a ball. There was also that thing where I was fat – still kind of am. My mind, on the other hand, gravitated towards the fantastic and scientific. It was only a matter of time before my dad...

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